Sunday, December 10, 2006

I've Moved! Please Come Visit!

I didn't mean to do this until the first of the year, but I seem to have done a booboo that left me no choice....oops! So please come visit over HERE at the new home of Red Shoe Ramblings. I don't have my own header yet and my sidebar's a mess, but the welcome mat is out! Also, if you have me on your blogroll or links list, or if you subscribe to this blog's feed, please change to the new URL. Thanks! (And sorry to be a pain, but I decided I've dealt with the vagaries of Blogger long enough!)

test

nothing to see here...

The Good, the Good, the Annoying, and the Interesting

The Good: Voting has now ended for the story contests. I would normally stick a link in that previous sentence, but I just flat don't feel like messing with it. If you don't know what I mean, look at yesterday's post. Or the day before. Or the day before that. Thank you to everyone who took the time to vote and tomorrow I'll post the winnahs! The Good: Check out what I got in the mail yesterday from Janet: How cool is that! It's hanging on my inspiration board now. Thank you, Janet! It's beautiful! :-) The Annoying: Bloglines. Bloglines was really annoying yesterday. They kept having some sort of cyber-hiccups or something so that every time I turned around they were telling me that some blogs I like to read had 25 new posts each. 25 each, y'all! At one point they were trying to tell me that there were something like 600+ new entries posted on blogs I subscribe to. I thought for a brief moment that that some of you really DID find a source for Writagra and were totally hogging it! But it was all an illusion. The ones that would show massive new content really had nothing new, while the ones that had new stuff posted sometimes didn't show it at all. And here I started using Bloglines to make life easier. Yeah. The Interesting: Today's DAT is some willow leaves that fell from our curly willow tree and landed in this interesting pattern. Well, I thought it was interesting anyway. I hope you do too. It almost looks to me like it should mean something. "Willow Leaves" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window)

Saturday, December 09, 2006

Where's the Writagra When You Need It?

Hi! Thanks for stopping by. I'm so happy to see you! But, um...I've got nuttin' today. Well, ok, that isn't entirely true. I have bunches of scribbled notes on the paper scattered around my desk, notes about possible future blog post ideas. And they're all things I really do want to talk about sometime. But as I look through them right now my reaction is Nope. No. Naw, not that one. Unh uh, I don't feel like writing about that one right now either. What we have here is is a failure to perform by the part of my brain that normally produces this BlogWritingStuff. I'm told it's nothing to worry about - that it happens to everyone now and then and I shouldn't make a big deal of it. I should just relax, try not to worry, give myself some time, and try again later. But for now I think I'll just leave you with a wee nag reminder and a photo and then roll over and go to sleep. Just give me a little shove if I snore. Heh. Reminder: You have just slightly less than 24 hours from the time I'm posting this to vote for your favorite entry in the "Hot HubbaBubba" or "Not Tonight, I Have a Headache" story contests. You can read the stories and the rules for how to vote HERE. Voting closes at 11:59 US EST today and I'll announce the winners on Monday. Here's today's Daily Art Thang: "Climb" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window) And what the heck - just because it's been quite a while since I posted one, here's the results of a quiz I took recently:
What Kind of Reader Are You?
Your Result: Dedicated Reader

You are always trying to find the time to get back to your book. You are convinced that the world would be a much better place if only everyone read more.

Obsessive-Compulsive Bookworm
Literate Good Citizen
Book Snob
Fad Reader
Non-Reader
What Kind of Reader Are You? Create Your Own Quiz
They're right. I DO think the world would be a better place if people read more. :-)

Friday, December 08, 2006

A Glimpse of my World #2 (with a couple of oh-so-fascinating digressions)

I want to share a few photos with you today. But first... Digression One: Before we get to the photos, here's a quick reminder that if you haven't voted yet for your favorite entry in the "Hot HubbaBubba" or "Not Tonight, I Have a Headache" story contests, you have today and tomorrow to get those votes in. You can read the entries HERE. And don't forget, only votes submitted by email count. If you tell me your favorites in the comments section, that's lovely and all, but it doesn't help the talented writer of your favorite story win a semi-fabulous prize. So email and vote! Digression Two: If you enjoy voting for those stories so much that you're looking all around just HOPING for something else to vote for, you could always try clicking HERE. Y'see, my website has been nominated to possibly be featured on the Indie-o-rama website if it gets enough votes. The catch is that you must be an Indie-o-rama member to vote, but if you are you can vote HERE. I'm nominated in the "Artists" category. If you aren't a member, you can join for free by clicking HERE (scroll down to the bottom for the free membership), and THEN go vote for me! You don't have to, of course. But if you do - Thank you! You're pretty! :-) Now on to the photos... Check out the handsome visitor who has been stopping by our house lately: I wish I knew his name, but I don't. He has a collar, but no name tag. We think we know who he belongs to - a neighbor we generally refer to as something that starts with a "B" and ends with an "itch." (Long story, but believe me she's earned the name.) He seems so sweet and if he was abandoned or obviously neglected I'd take him in, but I think he's being cared for physically. He just seems really lonely. (sigh....) Check out how green the grass is under his feet! That's what our yard looked like until yesterday, when we woke up to this: and this: I know it isn't much compared to the snow a lot of places around the US have already gotten lately, but it's the first snow we've seen around here this winter. It's prompted a lot of extra activity at the bird feeder that hangs outside our dining room window. We've been getting visitors like this guy: and these: Naturally, as soon as I put the camera away, a cardinal and a downy woodpecker visited. Pppffft. Earlier this week I took some full moon photos two nights in a row. Tuesday night the moon had the strongest, most colorful ring around it I think I've ever seen. It was like a ring-shaped rainbow. I tried to use the timer to capture it and while it isn't perfect, this next photo will give you the idea. It's also today's Daily Art Thang. "Moon Ring" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window) Hope you all have a wonderful weekend!

Thursday, December 07, 2006

Poetry Thursday: It Seems Like a Meme

The prompt this week on Poetry Thursday is something a little different - a meme! Anyone who has spent any time around RSR at all knows I looooves me some memes, so excuse me a moment while I do a happy little Snoopy Dance around the room. (lalala lalala lalaaaaa....lalalaaa lalalaaaa....) Aaahhh, that was fun. Now on to the meme. The part supplied by the prompt is in bold type while the answers I added are in not-so-bold type. 1. The first poem I remember reading/hearing/reacting to was probably Dr. Seuss. (And don't EVEN try to tell me that "Green Eggs and Ham" isn't poetry!) 2. I was forced to memorize "The Midnight Ride of Paul Revere" in school and um....well...nothing really. There is no "and" to that. That would be the first poem I remember being required to memorize, but I don't recall it having any significant impact on my life other than being a handy way to remember the signal in the church tower..."one if by land, and two if by sea, and I on the opposite shore will be, ready to ride and spread the alarm, to every Middlesex village and farm..." 3. I read/don't read poetry because it makes my heart sing and makes images dance through my head. 4. A poem I'm likely to think about when asked about a favorite poem is "High Flight." I know y'all must get tired of me bringing that one up so often, but it's one of the very first poems that ever made me want to read more poetry. 5. I write/don't write poetry, but not very often, and not very confidently. 6. My experience with reading poetry differs from my experience with reading other types of literature because for me poetry is more about the language itself - the rhythms and imagery of the words - and the feelings they evoke; while reading novels is more about the characters and the plot as driven by those characters, and if those stories happen to contain beautiful language and imagery then yay!...so much the better...but that's not why I read novels. 7. I find poetry in unexpected phrases that get stuck in my head and spark other images. Also, I find poetry in the poetry section of my book shelves. Ahem. 8. The last time I heard poetry was probably when I listened to an audio link posted by other bloggers. I seldom read poems aloud (although I really should!) and I'm not exactly in a part of the country that's big on poetry readings. 9. I think poetry is like a painting made of words. That doesn't mean I think it needs to be "pretty," just that it needs to capture something...some moment in time, some emotion or dream, some glimpse of truth, whether beautiful or ugly or anywhere in between. It's a way of looking at life and the world around us a little differently than we normally do. Here's today's Daily Art Thang: "Entanglement" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window) Want to hear more about the world of poetry? Then check out links at the Poetry Thursday blog.

Wednesday, December 06, 2006

Read and Vote and Vote!

Today I'm going to switch things around and share the Daily Art Thang first and after that you get to read the fabulicious contest entries and I'll tell you how to vote for your favorite! DAT, taken while on a walk with J: "Silhouette" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window) Now on to The Contest! Most of you will know what this is all about, but in case it's your first time here (lately or ever!) read this first so you know what the rules of the contest were. Go ahead, I'll wait. Lalalalalaaaaaa.... Back? Good! Then on to the vote! Here's how the voting will work: 1. I've posted all entries received - three for Contest One and seven for Contest two - anonymously, with just a number assigned to them. If any of these stories included the author's name within the body of the story (and a couple did!) I will substitute "Ms. X" for the name to keep it anonymous. 2. After you read the stories, please vote for your favorite for each contest. So you are allowed two votes total - one for the first contest, one for the second. If you entered, you are (of course!) more than welcome to vote for your own entry or entries! You are also welcome to link to this post on your blog and ask your friends to vote, but I ask that you please don't tell them which story is yours. You just have to trust that they'll have the good taste to like yours best. :-) 3. To vote, send an email with either "contest one" or "contest two" in the subject line and the number of the entry you are voting for in the body of the email. Send it to this address: tansy @ kywirelesscollc.com (remove the spaces on either side of the "@" to make that functional!). I'm asking that you send a separate email for each contest. Kind of a PITA, I know, sorry...but I have separate folders set up to collect votes for each contest and it will make it a thousand times easier on me if y'all send individual votes. Combined ones will make me grumpy. :-) ONLY email votes will count!!! If you merely say what your favorite is in the comments section, it does NOT count as a vote for that story!! 4. Voting will end Saturday night, Dec. 9th, 11:59 PM, US Eastern Standard Time, and winners will be announced here on Monday, Dec. 11th. If there is a tie for either contest, the tie will be broken by the time-honored "pick a name from a hat" method. 5. One final thought before we get to the entries...If you leave comments about the stories here in the comments section, please remember that the lovely, kind, and BRAVE people who wrote these and sent them in for your reading pleasure will be reading what you say about their stories, so be nice! :-) Ok, on to the stories at last... Contest One - the sex stories (Have no fear, these are all PG-rated...well, ok, maybe PG-13) ------------------------------ #1 We met, strangely enough, at the vet’s. I brought my bird named Trixie. Trixie was coughing and losing feathers. Teaching her to say, "Is that a pistol in your pocket or are you just happy to see me?" seemed like a good idea at the time. Turns out that Alan is an old movie buff. He brought his dog, Sam, to the vet’s the same day. Sam had chewed a rubber chicken in half and was suffering a slight digestive problem. Rubber chickens will do that..... Alan is tall, like me, blond hair and blue eyed. Those dreamy, get-lost-inside blue eyes. We met for coffee the next day. One thing lead to another and we were at his house. He lured me there with a promise to watch the "Jump the Shark" episode from Happy Days on DVD. After a cup of Irish coffee, I couldn’t care less what Richie was up to. All I wanted to do was kiss that man. We headed for the bedroom taking clothes off along the way. This is not my usual MO. I like to get to know someone first. It is better to know that they happen to have pink, fur-lined handcuffs in the bedside table, BEFORE, you end up in bed with them on your wrists. (Don’t ask how I found that out!) We spent the afternoon wrapped in his sheets, talking, laughing, and, well, you know. It seems Alan was really happy to see me.

Trixie? She and Sam both recovered. They spend a lot of time together, just like Alan and me. --------------------------------- #2 He came to her window again tonight. His visits had resumed after a long absence. An absence for which she only had herself to blame. He had come to her in silent adoration and she had driven him away with unkind words. But it must be true what they say about absence,for she had thought about him often during that time. And thinking about him made her crazy with a desire she couldn't name. She would stretch out on the bed and roll from side to side. Or she would lie on the floor, and pushing down with her feet, glide her body across the cool tiles. Or she would crouch in anticipation, like a cat in heat. Had he sensed that? Is that why he had started coming around again? But it was different now. HE was different somehow. He had started bringing her things. Strange things. Like last time he brought her a rubber chicken. What was he thinking? Did he really believe he could win her heart with that? (Now if he had brought her that damn noisy bird Trixie that lived down the hall...that would have been a different story!) And the time before that, it had been a pair of pink fur-lined handcuffs. What need did she have for little pink handcuffs? She already had her beloved little pink socks!

She sighed. And now here he was at her window tonight with the strangest, and,in her opinion,most useless offering of all. A “Happy Days” DVD. The one with the episode of the Fonz on water skis. She sighed again. She had always thought he was a pretty cool cat. Kinda funky. But now, he was ...well..he was just bizarre!!! She was going to have to tell him it was over between them. She tried to let him down as easily as she could. “You've really jumped the shark with this one, sweetie!” she said. Her words echoed in her head as he disappeared into the darkness. Jumped the shark...shark...shark... SHARK! The word hit her hard. FISH!!! YUM!!! ------------------------------------- #3 Deb missed Jon. He’d been gone all week for work and was due home tonight. If she could just come up with something, she could concentrate on making a wonderful welcome home dinner for him. Deb was a comedy writer for SNL and had been trying to convince Jon she wanted to be a serious writer. But to look at her now, with the pink fur-lined handcuffs and rubber chicken on the couch beside her, and DVD of the “Jump the Shark” episode from “Happy Days” beginning for what seemed like the hundredth time, she was still clueless for material for the opening sketch they needed for their guest host this week. She’d exchanged her pajamas for an old flannel shirt and shorts this morning and spent the day watching that episode so many times that her parrot, Trixie, was beginning to recite bits of dialog. There was a knock on her door; Jon was back early! Deb threw a pillow over the chicken and handcuffs and paused the DVD then rushed to the door to let him in. The door was barely shut when his snowy coat hit the floor. Lips locked, they inched toward the couch. Slowly, Jon unbuttoned the top button on her flannel shirt; this signaled a change in their relationship as he lowered her down onto the couch. He reached beneath her to pull the pillow from under her, only to have the chicken and handcuffs tumble to the floor. From his position over her he looked from the floor to the picture of Fonzie frozen on the TV screen and back to her face. He just smiled and, as he reached for the handcuffs, Trixie said, “Aaaaay. Cool.”

******************************** Contest Two - the excuses --------------------------------- #1 I had just finished typing up the sex scene you requested, and as it was set in the 1940s, of curse (oops, I meant course) I was using my beautiful old Smith Corona portable typewriter. Just as I hit the last key, Captain Jack Sparrow burst in bearing gifts, and by gifts I mean a pair of pink fur-lined handcuffs he'd picked up in Tortuga...said he traded a keg of rum for them, but knowing the good Captain, it was more probably a quite nearly empty glass he'd traded...along with that "shiver my timbers" grin of his. So the story was put aside for the time being, while we ensured the handcuffs 1) fit and 2) worked properly...and they most certainly did! We promptly fell asleep and when I awoke, I made the following discoveries: Captain Jack was gone, there was a rubber chicken, a shark & a Fonzie doll in his place, a DVD was playing in my VCR (I believe it was a Happy Days episode, where the Fonz is water skiing), and Trixie, my bird, was out of her cage and had a big evil grin on her lil beak. I got up, put on some coffee, and wandered over to the typewriter to take the page I'd typed the sex scene on out. To my horror, there were splotches of bird poop, completely hardened and covering most of the page. When I tried to pry it off, the letters underneath were gone, whole sentences of letters. This, of course, explains why Trixie was grinning. Damn that bird! ------------------------------ #2 I had every intention of writing a sex scene. I even found some pink fluffy handcuffs at our party store, because I thought a playful night of fooling around would give me fresh ideas. The best laid plans.. While I was shopping, I forgot to turn the oven down, so the object of the planned fun and games arrived home to dried-out casserole. He was particularly grumpy about it, made disparaging remarks about being forced to eat rubber chicken for dinner. So. off to a shaky start, amorous feelings were diminishing fast. However, not deterred easily, I slunk off to slip into a skimpy robe that l use when I need to bring out the big guns! How was I to know that at this moment my cat was hopping through the window with the neighbor's parrot, Trixie, clenched in his jaws? The neighbor followed, screeching louder than Trixie, and she only stopped when her eyes fell on me, leaping around in the famous little number, trying to save the unimpressed bird. Retrieving her pet, she backed out of the door with bulging eyes. I was hoping the beloved would see the funny side of this, but no, he gave me an ear-bashing about humiliating him in front of the neighborhood. We plunked down on the couch, flicking half-heartedly through the channels..nothing! So we put on our DVD of old Happy Days episodes, and as the Fonz found himself riding the shark, I was mumbling to myself that I would rather be doing that than riding this mean tempered old man next to me. I sat down at my keyboard with every intention of writing a sex scene, but not a saucy thought popped into my mind, and I realized I would need the mental equivalent of female Viagra to make this article happen... ----------------------------- #3 Deb, Ms. X will not be writing you a sex scene involving a rubber chicken, a pair of pink fur-lined handcuffs, a bird named Trixie, and a DVD of the Happy Days "Jump the Shark" episode. She was right there with you, thinking how much she would enjoy that postcard, until reading the list of required words. She's pretty sure she could get one hot enough and still reasonably clean with anything playing on the DVD in the background, including the "Jump the Shark" Happy Days episode. It's a bit harder to tune out a bird, especially one named Trixie, when you have two characters getting it on, but it's doable. And what's not to love about pink, fur-lined handcuffs? They are pink, soft and fuzzy, and if a burglar breaks in on the middle of the sex scene, can be put to a secondary practical purpose. No, it was the rubber chicken that was the deal breaker. Rubber chickens remind Ms. X of her father, who played many practical jokes that involved rubber chickens. (Helpful Hint: The proper preparation of a rubber chicken for any prank is to first fill it with baby powder, which can also be sexy - the powder, not the chicken full of powder, that is.) And thinking of dear old dad shut down Ms. X's sex scene creativity in less than the proverbial heart beat. She's now busily scrubbing some unwanted images from her mental processes. Therefore, please excuse Ms. X from writing a sex scene for your contest. Respectfully, Ms. X's totally traumatized subconscious -------------------------- #4 My coworkers were dancing on their desks and imbibing in “holiday cheer” Friday afternoon. Instead, I was sitting at my own desk using my work computer to write my DebR sex scene when my drunk boss entered my cube armed with mistletoe. When I tried to dodge his advances, he made a grab for my arm and the next thing I knew he had joined our wrists with pink fur-lined handcuffs. I let out a bloodcurdling scream which prompted a coworker to call 911. When the paddy wagon came, my boss and I (still cuffed together) were hauled off to jail where we were stashed in the drunk tank with a man dressed as a pirate with a parrot he called Trixie duct taped to his shoulder and a businessman from Peoria who kept asking me if I was Rachael Ray. After the booking sergeant and his buddies finished making crap out of the “Jump the Shark” episode of “Happy Days” they were watching when we were brought in, they finally unlocked the fur-lined cuffs and let me go when I proved that I hadn’t had anything to drink and was a victim of circumstance. By the time I returned to the office, I was met at the door by a security guard who escorted me to my cubicle, where I found my computer wiped clean and my personal belongings and a misguided rubber chicken leftover from the holiday party packed into a cardboard box on my desk. The office manager had found my sex scene and told me I was not to return. I didn’t have a chance to e-mail the sex scene home so, sadly, I will be unable to participate in our contest. -------------------------- #5 Actually I was all ready to sit down and write this wonderful love scene. But, it has been a hell of a week. The kids are just driving me crazy. Just yesterday I came home from work to find our seven-year-old Lizzie handcuffed to the bed with a pair of pink fur-lined handcuffs. I freaked out. Seems Johnny, who is seven-years-old and lives next door is the one who was doing the handcuffing. In my sternest voice I told him to uncuff my daughter immediately and no I did not want to know what his mommy and daddy did when mommy had on the handcuffs. I always wondered about them! Julianne, who has now become a teenager, has suddenly developed an interest in the old "Happy Days" and seems to think that the "Jump the Shark" episode is okay for her to watch twenty-four hours a day. But, you know what they are like when they are teenagers. There is just no way to control them. Adam decided he would try out his science experiment in my oven. Have you ever smelled a burned rubber chicken? I spent hours trying to get the smell out of the house and damn near froze my butt off because I had to leave the windows open for two days. Oh, but the best was Clyde came home from a business trip this week and it seems he won a bird named Trixie in a poker game. Of course, he arrived about the time the pastor showed up to see how we were doing. Pastor James looked at the bird and said, "Oh, what a lovely parrot, you are!" to which Trixie replied, "Oh, fuck a duck!" Honey, I never realized Pastor James had false teeth until I saw them on my carpet. I know all this isn't a great excuse, but, I am just exhausted and I don't think I could think of a sex scene if I tried. Your friend, Ms. X(2) ---------------------------------- #6 I was SO SO going to write the sex story (though mine would be closer to an nc-17, I think, than a pg rating). so, here's what happened...this morning as I went to write the story, I realized I needed to get some food for the peacock. Trixie was (and still is!) screaming her fool head off as only peacocks can truly do. CPS is going to come at any moment thinking I am physically harming a child. yeah yeah, she needs food. what's a girl to do. I realized that my fabulous pink and fuzzy handcuffs HAD to come off. I couldn't very well go to the store with the handcuffs dangling from one of my wrists, now could I? I mean, I KNOW people in this town. rob had managed to abscond with HIS copy of the special key and he'd neglected to tell me where the extra was. so, off to the phone I went. rob had no IDEA where the extra set was. he hears Trixie hollering in the background. he even started feeling a little bad about leaving me in this predicament. He called me back just a few minutes ago and asked if I'd found it. nope. still nothing. where ARE they? At this point, I figure it's just as likely that they're in the inside that upidstay shark that the fonz had to jump over in what was probably one of THE lamest episodes of Happy Days ever (what was rob THINKING when he bought that DVD?) as it is that they're in the house somewhere. because my house is rarely spic and span, finding them is proving.ahem.difficult. and because I'm frantic about the lost key, there is no way that I can get in the mood to write a fabulous sex scene. the only thing that in my head that I can write down is some nonsense about a rubber chicken - now really, how sexy is THAT? so clearly, I can't do it. it would be in bad taste. and my handcuffs keep knocking on the keyboard. so sorry. -Ms. X (3) ps - I really have well and truly lost my keys and it's just about killing me! ---------------------------- #7 The Best of Intentions By Ms. X (4) Working away late one night on my first novel, I paused and stretched my weary arms in the air and rolled my neck to loosen the tight muscles.My heroine had just had a scathing and witty exchange with the handsome young stud of a police detective. The electricity was in the flowing between their catty barbs and the underlying chemistry between the two was boiling to the surface. This would be an excellent point for a steamy sex scene, but could I really pull this off? Did a Bible study leader and Sunday school teacher really have it in her to write something realistic? I settled into the computer and stared at the screen. Nothing. I opened another document and started typing random words to use in the scene. “Rapturous, quivering, milky . . .” I felt a little bit of bile in the back of my throat. Good grief, this wasn’t a trashy romance novel. Hmmm . . . how to write a classy, mature, really authentic sex scene? I decided to look for some inspiration. Thunk. Thunk. Thunk. I flipped through our DVD collection. Fantasia – fireworks, but not the right kind. The Little Mermaid – well the girl could wear a seashell bra and carry it off. The Best of Happy Days – The Fonz. Now there was some smoldering sexy. Flipping to the back cover the picture of the Fonz on water-skis made me chuckle. Nothing like “jumpin’ the shark” to suck the sexy out of a leather jacketed icon. Giving up on the DVDs, I decided to flip on the television to see if inspiration was waiting somewhere on cable TV. On the first channel – one of the gazillion Law and Order series’. “Detective – are you telling me the only witness to this murder is the owner’s bird” “Trixie, Your Honor. Her name is Trixie.” Hmmm – is it too late to introduce a slut named Trixie into the storyline? Make a note of that. She could cause problems for the happy couple – IF I CAN EVER GET THEM TOGETHER!!! Change the channel. Oh wait, this looks promising. Nip Tuck – soft core porn on basic cable. Perfect! Wow, that Christian Troy is a sexy guy. But wait a minute, what is he doing? What is that in his hand? Oh my . . .is that. . .a rubber chicken? (The gag reflex automatically starts to fire again and I have no desire to revisit the dinner I choked down earlier in the evening.) I snatched up the remote and turned off the TV. Now it was time for the big guns. Sneaking into my bedroom and moving with all the stealth and silence I could muster as not to wake up Brad, I opened my lingerie drawer and reached to the back for a small white box. Inside, was a gift from my bridal shower, some friend of my mom’s thought it was such a clever and kinky gift - pink fur-lined handcuffs. I never told my husband about them thinking I’d never have a use for such a thing. But low and behold, they might be just the talisman this gal needed to get some steamy inspiration. I laid them on the desk and stared at them for ages. Picking them up, I twirled them around a few times. I wonder how these things work? Click. Crap. Well, you can probably guess the rest. The sex scene never got written, and my husband couldn’t stop laughing as he drove me to the locksmith the next morning to have my fuzzy pink handcuffs removed from my hands. The characters will have to wait for the blush to clear from my face before I can get back to their potential for some – er – resolution. ---------------------------- And that's it, y'all! Time to email in those votes. Remember, you get one per contest. :-)

Tuesday, December 05, 2006

SPC: Red, Week 1 - From Glam to Real Life

The December theme for the Self-Portrait Challenge is RED! Considering the name of my blog, I bet it won't come as a great shock to anyone to hear that I really like this theme. This is one of those months when my problem won't be coming up with ideas. The problem will be narrowing down those ideas to just one per week! I really liked last month's Glam theme too, although I chose to go for a more Hollywood version than a rock-n-roll version. Ironically the Glam theme inspired me to go out and buy my first-ever tube of red lipstick. I've owned almost-red before...a sort of reddish-brown called "Cocoa", and an almost burgundy-ish shade called "Raisin", but never red until now. I'm still not sure I'm comfortable with it, but it's kind of cool knowing it's in my make-up bag if I want to use it, which is what I did for this first photo: "Red Lips" But that photo doesn't feel very much like ME. That photo is still just me playing dress-up for the camera, just like I did all last month, and that's fun but not something I want to do all the time. So my real self-portrait for this week, the one that shows a much more typical view of my love for the color red is this one: "Red Shoes for Real Life" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window)

Monday, December 04, 2006

Random Items from the Junk Drawer of my Mind #34

1. Here's one final annoying plea last-call reminder about the infamous story contest. You have less than twenty-four hours to send me a fun little story for your chance to win a Box o' Goodies! (Click here for details.) TickTock, TickTock... The entries will be posted here on Wednesday, at which time all you wonderful RSR visitors get to help me choose a pair of winners! 2. Sending out big Happy Birthday wishes to my nephew, Josh, who is turning 16 today. Happy Birthday, Josh! Let me know when I should start hiding my car keys. :-) 3. I used to be soSO into all things Christmas. The baking, the decorating, the shopping for and wrapping of gifts. Any more....not so much. I've been almost Scrooge-like the past couple of years. I've gotten to where I do the vast majority of what shopping I do online (although I still enjoy wrapping gifts). And I didn't do much baking, or decorate at all last year. But this year my family and I are reviving the baking tradition, and I got a Spirit-of-Christmassy wild hair the other day and put up a tree. I'm kind of proud of myself for putting up a tree this year, but still, looking through my old photos shows what may be a disturbing trend. Take a look... December, 1998: December, 2002: December, 2005: But this is an improvement over that last one, right? December, 2006: It's little and it's fake, but hey, it's a tree with tinsel and a star on top. Yeah, baby! 4. THANK YOU to everyone who was supportive in the face of my big fat whine yesterday. You guys are the best! 5. Here's today's Daily Art Thang, an old foot bridge in the woods, that is now turning itself into a moss garden of sorts: "Shattered" (clickable)

Sunday, December 03, 2006

You Come For Fun, I Give You a Little Nag and Whine (yeah, baby!)

The Nag Here's yet another annoying shove gentle reminder before we get to anything else. You still have the better part of two days to send me a silly little story and have a chance to win Fun Stuff! (Click here for details.) And don't be surprised when you see yet another nag mention of this tomorrow. So far the competition is small, but mighty. And those of you who have been brave enough to enter Contest One are doing a great job of meeting the challenge while still keeping things PG-rated. Thank you! :-) And if you want to read the story that was the reply to the challenge that started it all, check out Dragonfly's story. Keep in mind hers is much longer than what I'm asking for from y'all for the contest, since this whole thing started as more of a dare between friends, but I thought she did a super-fabulous job of meeting the challenge. Brava, Dragonfly!!! Your postcard will be in the mail in the next couple of days. And the Whine (pass the cheese...) I've been taking photos to possibly use for the December Self-Portrait Challenge theme of Red and I can already tell this is going to be one of those months when I have more photos I like than weeks to use them. The November and December themes were/are both things that I loved, so what do you want to bet that January - which contains 5 Tuesdays - will have a theme that makes me cringe. It just always seems to work that way. Heh. But now, I'm going to admit something not-too-pretty here. I'm finding myself with a wee bit of an Attitude Problem about the SPC at the moment and I'm working on getting past that. The point of the challenge should be for me to do it for myself - as a way to creatively interpret a theme with a subject (me!!) that doesn't always make me comfortable (although participating in the SPC for so long really has made me more comfortable with having my photo taken than I've ever been in my life). Mostly I think I DO do it just for the creative satisfaction. But there's that small, fiercely competitive part of me that craves recognition, and that part wants a nod now and then from the features editors. I found myself feeling a teensy bit discouraged and bitter to have put so much effort into the posts I did for the November theme only to not be given a mention by even a single features editor for a single week. I've been letting that suck some of the joy from the December theme for me...having just a bit of a "why bother" sort of attitude toward it. SO, my goal for today is to get right the hell over myself and come up with something FUN to post for Tuesday without getting my panties in a twist if the Powers That Be of the challenge don't think it's "good enough." Pppffftt! (Psssttt, Morven....Sorry about the "panties" thing...hehehe) I figure if I set that goal publicly I have to follow through. :-) Daily Art Thang "Intersection" (clickable if you want to see it larger)

Saturday, December 02, 2006

A Post to Tell You Stuff You Never Knew You Wanted to Know

Here's a quick nag reminder before we get to our regularly scheduled post. Don't forget, you have slightly less than three more days to send me a little story and have a chance to win some semi-fabulous prizes! (Click here for details.) The postcards are finished and the other stuff is purchased and it's all stuff I'd enjoy getting in the mail myself so I hope the winners will like it too. How bad could it be to get some Free Stuff in the mail, yes? :-) So write away, my lovelies...write away right away, before the deadline creeps up on you! Now here, in RSR Saturday tradition, is a meme. I snagged this one from Angela, who borrowed it from Kristen. When is the last time you held hands with someone? Wednesday, when J and I took a walk together. He left town early Thursday morning and only got home a couple of hours ago and went straight to bed, so unless you count getting my dog Riley to "shake" there have been no hand-holding opportunities since then. You wake up as the opposite gender, what's the first thing you do? Probably scream like a little girl. Oh come on...don't tell me that wouldn't freak YOU right the hell out! Figuring out interesting stuff to try would come later, after the hysterical fit. Have you ever touched an electric fence? Not on purpose but yes, I've accidentally touched one before. They hurt every bit as much as you'd think they would. Where is your mom? Physically she's gone, but I believe she's around me and my family. Morning or night person? Night. SoSoooo night. What is the last movie you watched? At the cinema: Casino Royale At home: Some sappy Hallmark thing that made me cry. I don't know why I feel compelled to watch those things when I KNOW they make me cry and I HATE that! Things about the opposite sex you notice first? Eyes, smile, hands, height (or lack thereof) Ever been in love? Have been and am. What's something your friends make fun of you for? How foggy-headed and grumpy I often am first thing in the morning. (Did I mention the part about being a night person??) What is your curfew? Aaahh, and here we discover that this is yet another meme that must have been written by a teener for his or her MySpace page. One of these days I'm going to write a meme that asks stuff like how much life insurance a person has, and how many prescriptions they currently take, and do they prefer Arnica Gel or Ben-Gay for their various aches and pains. I'm just sayin'... So ok, dear Teener, one of the deals of not being a teener anymore is that you set your very own curfews, even when you choose badly, which I often do. I stay up later than I probably should pretty much every night, but even when I'm wide awake at 2 AM, I'm not breaking a curfew. RahRah for adulthood! Heh. Would you ever dye your hair red? Of course not! I'm appalled at the very IDEA!! Bwahahahahaaaaaaaa!! What's your worst personality flaw? I'm just too, TOO perfect. (Kidding....y'all know I'm kidding, right?) I hate questions like this. I have so many flaws to choose from, but I don't particularly like to focus on any of them! For today let's go with the flaw of excessive self-indulgence. Or oooooh, how about the flaw of an unnatural fondness for exclamation points!!!!! :-) What career would you wish to be in? Jet-setting heiress. Hey, don't ask if you don't want to know. Which country would you like to visit? It's a tie between Italy, Greece, and New Zealand. Oh! And since seeing Casino Royale, I also really want to see Montenegro. And y'know I've always been interested in seeing France and the UK. And ooooh, Spain and Switzerland, Prague, the Netherlands, Belgium, Germany, the Scandinavian countries...yeah, let's just say pretty much all of Europe. Iceland looks pretty. And I'd love to see the Forbidden City and Great Wall in China. And Egypt. I'd really like to see the pyramids and the Sphinx. Oh! And since seeing Sue's photos I want to visit her in South Africa. Edited to add: Yes, Caity, Australia too! (Can't believe I forgot to mention that one. Oops!) Now do you see WHY I want to be a jet-setting heiress?? Do you want a well paying job or a job you enjoy? Sure, both - thanks! If I can't be a jet-setting heiress, that'd be great. When do I start? Do you wish to have the same best friends when you're older? Yeah, that'd be good. Do you believe in needing religion? I believe I need (and have) a connection to something greater than myself in my life, but for me that need is not tied to organized religion. Where's your dad? Kentucky, around an hour and a half drive from here. When were you last on the phone? Yesterday, with J. What shoes are you wearing today? At the moment I don't have on "real" shoes. I'm wearing fleece-lined pink suede clog-style house slippers. Do you like math? I detest it and the feeling is mutual. Numbers simply don't behave properly for me. Think I'm kidding? Ask me sometime to share the story about my checking account and the tricksy numbers that even freaked out some people who worked for the bank. What about history? I find it fascinating when it's told in a way that makes it real. So many history books are so dry. But when it comes alive and we get that these were real people, just like us, and the story of their very real struggles - like I said...fascinating. Have you ever seen 5 squirrels at one time? What an utterly bizarre question! I've certainly seen more than one squirrel at a time, but I have absolutely no idea if I've ever seen exactly 5 at a time. What next, a question about if I've ever seen six swans or 12 dancing princesses? Can you touch your nose with your tongue? Not even close. Do you have a brother? Yep! Did your great granddad fight in the civil war? I don't think any of my great-grandfathers did. If you go back another great or so, there may have been some who did, but I don't know for sure. If any of them did, I don't know who, and I wouldn't know which side they fought for. My ancestors at that time (from both sides of the family) would've been living in southern Kentucky, near the Tennessee border, which was one of the areas of the US with the most deeply divided loyalties at that time. Do you like hugs? Depends entirely on who they're from. I LOVE hugs from people I like or love. Not so much from people I don't know well or don't like so much. Do you want to be a doctor? No. Although it might be fun to play one on TV. :-) (Raise your hand if you're old enough to get the pop culture reference.) What do you do right before you go to bed? Take off my glasses. Right when you get out of bed? Put on my glasses. Do you want to be famous? Not especially. It sounds inconvenient. Do you do your own laundry? Yep. Until I get that jet-setting heiress gig, there's no one else gonna do it for me! Wanna be tagged to do this meme on your blog? It's self-serve! Tell me so in comments and run with it, baby. :-) Daily Art Thang: "Fern Walk" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window)

Friday, December 01, 2006

November Bliss List in December, Complete with a Digression or Two

It's Bliss List time again! Ok, it's actually a little PAST Bliss List time, since it's now the first day of December and I'm posting my list for November, but WhatEVER, Dude. I spent most of yesterday fighting mad hordes of Crazed Christmas Cshoppers (had to make it alliterative - don't ask me how to pronounce it) in order to get groceries because they say our weirdly warm weather (more alliteration!) is coming to an end today and we may get some snow and everyone in the civilized world knows that if the weather forecast calls for snow you must - MUST!! - go to the grocery store and buy bread and milk. It's a law or something. Please don't anyone tell the Grocery Police that I bought tortillas and pepper jack cheese and pomegranates instead. And some other food too, I forget what. And two books. Oh, and a tree! I bought a wee-teensy fake-o Christmas tree today. But more on that later, because it's Bliss List time! Here are some things that have been making me feel Blissful in November:
  • The gloriously messy sweetness of pomegranates
  • The vibrantly messy colors of winter sunsets
  • That early nightfall makes it so easy to snuggle up on my favorite corner of the couch and read a book without feeling like I should be doing something else instead
  • That even though I'm not a fan of winter, it gives me a reason to wear warm, soft, fuzzy hats and scarves and I AM a fan of those
  • It's the perfect time of year to make and eat homemade vegetable soup and grilled cheese sandwiches. Yum!
  • Spending time with family
  • Going on Photo Safaris to look for artful views of everyday things
  • The sight of such colorful and intricate blooms on such a spindly, homely-looking plant as my Christmas cactus
  • (my darling) Clementines
"November Bliss" (clickable if you want to see it larger in a new window) What's making you feel blissful this month? In one last digression (well one last one for TODAY, I mean, not one last one EVER, so don't go getting your hopes up), this post completes one full year of Bliss Lists. I started this series in December of 2005 and am trying to decide if I want to continue it into 2007 or if I want to end it here. Will I find new things to make me feel blissful each month if I continue, or would I just be recycling thoughts and images I've posted during this past year? Hhhmmm... I don't know the answer to those questions yet. I guess we'll all find out sometime in the next month or so.