Wednesday, April 20, 2005

Fading Away

Our oldest dog, Tansy, is an overweight, nine-year-old Golden Retriever mix. She's prone to all sorts of skin problems, including some nasty hot spots, so we've gotten in the habit of trimming her hair very short every spring and summer. Rather than paying a pro to do it, we bought some clippers and do it ourselves. She probably doesn't get the most even haircut in the world, but it's not too bad and she seems much more comfortable when we're done. So...a couple of days ago we decided it was time to give Tansy her first haircut of the season. Our youngest dog, Riley, who is a fluffy-haired Heinz 57 mutt, needed some grooming too. She's shedding like mad and desperately needed to be combed. So I left Johnny on the front porch with Tansy and the clippers, while I worked on Riley with an undercoat rake inside. A little while later, when I decided I'd done all I could do for the moment, I went outside to see how Tansy's haircut was progressing. May I just say, with complete sincerity, Oh My Gawd!!!! Johnny had taken the little depth guide thingy off the clippers and had simply sheared her sides nearly down to the skin (except for random patches that he missed!), while leaving the hair on her back its normal length. He'd given her a Fade cut! A really, really BAD Fade cut!! If she were human, the trauma of this haircut would mean we'd be paying for therapy for her for a very long time, or maybe getting a call to appear on the Jerry Springer show, or both. But luckily, she's a dog, and a very good-natured one at that. That's one thing you've gotta love about dogs. Most of them don't hold grudges. Here's a picture of Tansy with the man who did this to her. I guess I'm a bad "parent" too. If she were human, posting this picture on the 'net would probably earn me a chapter in her autobiography. And not in a good way.